In the previous two Q&As, we discussed the fact that children of at least one converted parent are “sanctified” or “holy” in God’s eyes, which means that they can have a special and intimate relationship with God; that they CAN speak to God, expecting to be heard, and that they can experience and obtain an answer from God. We pointed out that they are not cut off from God the Father, but that they must make the decision of wanting to have continuing contact with God, by not neglecting or forsaking the Way of God.

We also discussed the blessing of little children and the fact that God assigns guardian angels to them for their protection, so that they can reach their potential of becoming baptized and ultimately born-again members in the God Family. We also showed that it is eventually the decision of the child or teenager or young adult as to how to conduct his or her Way of Life and whether or not to maintain a relationship with God.

Still, as we alluded to in the previous two Q&As, the teaching and conduct of parents can have great influence on the decision of the children to either become and stay loyal to God or to reject Him. In regard to Sabbath observance, we pointed out that “those children who are being taught and raised by their converted parents must come to the point where they prove for themselves that what they are being taught is true. They might have developed a ‘habit,’ due to the teaching and practice of their parents, to ‘keep’ the Sabbath by ‘going to church’ that day and sitting quietly in services for two hours, but that alone is never enough. Rather, they must prove for themselves in due time that God demands of them the keeping of the Sabbath and the annual Holy Days; the abstention from unclean meat; and the rejection of observing Sunday, Christmas, Easter or Halloween—again, no matter the costs and circumstances.”

This applies, as we explained, to all areas of life. In this regard, the example of parents is very important. For instance, when parents keep the Sabbath just as a matter of routine, but they are doing so grudgingly and with resentment and the attitude that it is a burden, and “we can hardly wait for when the Sabbath is over so we can do our own thing,” they give very mixed signals to the child as to the sanctity of the Sabbath and that it is supposed to be a day of joy.

We stated this in our free booklet, “The Key to Happy Marriages and Families”:

“In order to be able to teach God’s word effectively, it must first be settled in the hearts of the teachers themselves. Notice Deuteronomy 6:6–7, ‘And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.’

“If the words of God are NOT in our hearts, HOW CAN WE teach them diligently to our children? If we ourselves are not sure whether God’s instructions always apply in every situation without fail, how CAN we teach our children or teens that they do? If we doubt whether it is ALWAYS right NOT to lie, NOT to steal, NOT to kill, NOT to break the Sabbath, NOT to cheat on our wife or husband, how CAN we bring up our children or teens in the admonition of the Lord?”

It is true, as we pointed out in the previous Q&A, that the righteousness of parents does not automatically mean that their children become and stay righteous; but converted parents who behave unrighteously certainly have a bad influence on the upbringing of their children. At the same time, righteous parents who behave righteously most certainly have a good influence on the upbringing of their children, helping them to make the right decision of staying loyal to God and responding to His calling.

The Bible emphasizes time and again that children will follow the example of parents who behave badly. The child of an alcoholic or of a homosexual parent may easily adopt that lifestyle. A father who beats his wife may raise a son who may do the same later to his wife. Abraham lied when he said that his wife was his sister (Genesis 20:2,13); and his son Isaac committed the same sin (Genesis 26:6-7).

David lusted after Bathsheba, but he also took other women, including Maacah, a Geshurite or Canaanite princess (something which God had forbidden; compare Deuteronomy 7:3). Their son Absalom (2 Samuel 3:3) killed his half-brother Amnon who had raped Absolom’s sister Tamar (2 Samuel 13:1-14). David’s son Solomon committed terrible sins when he married pagan wives and followed their pagan religion.

We pointed out in the previous Q&A that God will visit the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generation of those children who hate God (Exodus 20:5). Friedman, Commentary on the Torah, points out that this “may refer to the way in which [bad] behavior recurs through generations in a family.”

Christ emphasized that wicked fathers may bring up wicked children. He explained in Matthew 23:29-35 that even though the children might pretend to have acted differently, they would have done the same thing as their fathers did, as they were engaged in the same kind of practice as their fathers:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! Because you build the tombs of the prophets and adorn the monuments of the righteous, and say, ‘If we had lived in the days of our fathers, we would not have been partakers with them in the blood of the prophets.’ Therefore you are witnesses against yourselves that you are sons of those who murdered the prophets. Fill up, then, the measure of your fathers’ guilt. Serpents, brood of vipers! How can you escape the condemnation of hell? Therefore, indeed, I send you prophets, wise men, and scribes: some of them you will kill and crucify, and some of them you will scourge in your synagogues and persecute from city to city, that on you may come all the righteous blood shed on the earth, from the blood of righteous Abel to the blood of Zechariah, son of Berechiah, whom you murdered between the temple and the altar.”

This terrible and vicious “circle of life” is, sadly, repeated time and time again. God prophesies that the last generation of Americans and Brits will go into captivity, and Leviticus 26:37-39 explains why: “… you shall have no power to stand before your enemies. You shall perish among the nations, and the land of your enemies shall eat you up. And those of you who are left shall waste away in their iniquity in your enemies’ lands; also in their fathers’ iniquities, which are with them, they shall waste away.”

We emphasize that this development does not have to be automatic. A son can see the wickedness of his father and decide NOT to live that way (Ezekiel 18:14-17). This is especially true, in our context of sanctification, when a child was brought up in the church but then experiences that his parents leave and go back into the world. That child does not need to follow his parents’ example. God had sanctified him or her, and that sanctification or holiness does not automatically cease to exist when the parents leave God’s Way of Life. But it goes without saying that their bad example might have a tremendously bad influence on the child; and the child or teen or young adult must turn to God with all his or her might to maintain his or her sanctified relationship with Him.

On the other hand, parents who live God’s Way of Life and don’t deviate from it have a very positive influence on the child’s development. God promises children tremendous blessings if they stay righteous (Psalm 103:17-18; Proverbs 20:7; Deuteronomy 4:40). God even offers physical protection in these terrible times to come, at a place of safety here on earth, for righteous parents and their children: “In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, And His children will have a place of refuge” (Proverbs 14:26).

God speaks very clearly about the responsibility of the parents when He says: “Observe and obey all these words which I command you, that it may go well with you and your children after you forever, when you do what is good and right in the sight of the LORD your God” (Deuteronomy 12:28). But God makes clear that when it comes to observing the law of God, more is necessary than just “keeping” it, so that parents can be great examples:

“Oh, that they had such a heart in them that they would fear Me and always keep all My commandments, that it might be well with them and with their children forever!” (Deuteronomy 5:29).

We all will, to an extent, adopt the bad behavior of our parents. And as they are called upon to repent of it, we, as their children, must do likewise, and the same is true for our children. This command to repent applies also to the “children” of the last generation of Americans and Brits in captivity:

“But if they confess their iniquity and the iniquity of their fathers, with their unfaithfulness in which they were unfaithful to Me, and that they also have walked contrary to Me, and that I also have walked contrary to them and have brought them into the land of their enemies; if their uncircumcised hearts are humbled, and they accept their guilt—then I will remember My covenant with Jacob, and My covenant with Isaac and My covenant with Abraham I will remember; I will remember the land” (Leviticus 26:40-42).

As the new generation of Israel was called upon to enter into a covenant relationship with God at Moab, so each of us—grandparent, parent, children and grandchildren—is individually challenged to make that personal decision to follow God and not to walk away. It is interesting to read the words of Moses to that new generation of people who were ready to enter the Promised Land:

“The LORD our God spoke to us in Horeb, saying: ‘You have dwelt long enough at this mountain. Turn and take your journey, and go to the mountains of the Amorites, to all the neighboring places in the plain, in the mountains and in the lowland, in the South and on the seacoast, to the land of the Canaanites and to Lebanon, as far as the great river, the River Euphrates. See, I have set the land before you; go in and possess the land which the LORD swore to your fathers–to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob—to give to them and their descendants after them.’ And I spoke to you at that time, saying: ‘I alone am not able to bear you’” (Deuteronomy 1:6-9).

Moses reiterates events which had happened 40 years earlier. Most who were assembled now were not even alive when these events had taken place. Still, Moses addresses them directly in saying that he spoke to them. What had happened 40 years earlier had great consequences for the new generation. In Deuteronomy 1:21, Moses said to them: “Look, the LORD your God has set the land before you; go up and possess it, as the LORD God of your fathers has spoken to you; do not fear or be discouraged.”

The word in Hebrew for “you” is in the singular; Moses addresses everyone individually, because everyone had to make the individual decision to follow God. And so, Moses states this in Deuteronomy 5:2-3:

“The LORD our God made a covenant with us in Horeb. The LORD did not make this covenant with our fathers, but with us, those who are here today, all of us who are alive.”

Technically, God did not make the covenant at Horeb with the new generation as most were not even alive at that time. But in a sense, God did.

In Hebrew, it says, literally:

“… but with us! We! These! Here! Today! All of us! Living!”

Friedman, Commentary on the Torah, explains:

“Moses speaks to the people in front of him as if they had all been at Sinai forty years earlier. Now he says explicitly, powerfully, unmistakably, with seven different words: Each generation must see themselves as personally standing at Sinai, not just inheriting their parents’ covenant, but as making the covenant themselves. It is a present, living commitment.”

Parents might have entered into the New Covenant relationship at the time of their baptism. But this will not bring their children automatically to the point where they also become baptized. It is up to them. But converted parents can and must help.

Let us conclude with these questions and remarks:

Are you a converted parent? Make sure that you do whatever you can to help your child to live God’s Way of Life.

Are you a sanctified child? Then God has preordained you before you were born to be called in this day and age to have a special relationship with Him and to come to Him. He has chosen YOU and given YOU the opportunity now to become a part His very Family. Value this precious and priceless gift very highly.

Lead Writer: Norbert Link

In the previous Q&A, we discussed the fact that children of at least one converted parent are “sanctified” or “holy” in God’s eyes, which means that they can have a special and intimate relationship with God; that they CAN speak to God, expecting to be heard, and they can experience and obtain an answer from God. They are not cut off from God the Father, but they must make the decision of wanting to have continuing contact with God, by not neglecting or forsaking the Way of God.

We also discussed the blessing of little children and the fact that God assigns guardian angels to them for their protection, so that they can reach their potential of becoming baptized and ultimately born-again members in the God Family.

It is true, of course, that the teaching and conduct of parents can have an influence on the decision of the children to either become and stay loyal to God or to reject Him, but, as we will show, it is ultimately the decision of the child or teenager or young adult as to how to conduct his or her Way of Life and whether or not to maintain a relationship with God.

For instance, we read in 2 Kings 22:1–2, “Josiah was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned thirty-one years in Jerusalem. His mother’s name was Jedidah the daughter of Adaiah of Bozkath.And he did what was right in the sight of the LORD, and walked in all the ways of his father David; he did not turn aside to the right hand or to the left.”

Josiah was eight years old when he became king. His mother is mentioned by name—Jedidah. Although the son of an evil father, Amon, he turned out to be one of the most righteous and outstanding kings that have ever lived (compare 2 Kings 23:25). It is obvious that his mother Jedidah had trained him up “in the fear of the LORD.”

When Josiah was 16 years old, “while he was still young, he began to seek the God of his father David” (2 Chronicles 34:3). Notice, it was he himself who made the decision; it was his decision—not the decision of his mother—prompting him to really seek the true God and to become more and more familiar with Him.

It is critically important to realize and emphasize the individual decision of the child. The righteousness of parents does not automatically mean that their children become and stay righteous; and the unrighteousness of parents does not mean that their children must become and stay unrighteous.

David was a righteous man who will be in the Kingdom of God. But his son Absalom rebelled against his father and God. David’s son Amnon violated his step-sister. David’s son Solomon departed from God’s Way of Life–at least temporarily.

Samuel was a righteous prophet of God, but his sons did not walk in God’s ways (1 Samuel 8:3).

Noah was a righteous man, but the Bible does not say that his sons were righteous. In fact, we read that his grandson Canaan, the youngest son of Ham, violated and sexually abused his own grandfather (see Genesis 9:20-27; it was Ham’s youngest son Canaan who had violated Noah, compare verse 24 in most translations, but Ham was not Noah’s youngest son).

Lot was righteous, but this cannot be said about his two daughters (Genesis 19:30-38).

There is even strong evidence to conclude that Moses’ grandson, Jonathan, was deeply involved in idolatry (Judges 18:30; other translations and commentaries say here that Gershom was the son of “Moses”; not of “Manasseh”).

The Bible makes it very clear that in the end, every person is individually responsible for what he or she is doing. To blame shortcomings on others is not an acceptable “excuse” in the eyes of God. In Ezekiel 18:4, God explains that the soul who sins shall die. He then describes a righteous father who begets an unrighteous son, and explains that the unrighteous son will die because of his unrighteousness, while the father will live because of his righteousness (Ezekiel 18:5-13). We read in Ezekiel 14:19-20:

“‘Or if I send a pestilence into that land and pour out My fury on it in blood, and cut off from it man and beast, even though Noah, Daniel, and Job were in it, as I live,’ says the LORD God, ‘they would deliver neither son nor daughter; they would deliver only themselves by their righteousness.”‘

On the other hand, we also read in Ezekiel 18:14-17 that if an unrighteous father begets a son who sees and considers the sins of his father and decides to live a righteous life instead, he will “not die for the iniquity of his father; He shall surely live.”

Exodus 20:4-6 does not contradict the foregoing. It reads: “You shall not make for yourself a carved image… you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me, but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My commandments.”

This passage does not say that the child will be cursed by God because of his or her parents’ sins, even though the child itself is innocent. Note that Exodus 20:5 speaks of those “who hate Me.” Soncino points out that the phrase applies to the children; i.e., God will punish those children who hate Him. Soncino comments, too, that the punishment will be brought upon the children, “when they retain the evil deeds of their fathers.”

The Companion Bible comments on Ezekiel 18:4, 20: “Descendants were not punished for the sins of their ancestors unless they persevered in their ancestors’ sins.” In addition, passages like Deuteronomy 24:16 state that children are not to be put to death for the sins of their fathers. The same is expressed in 2 Kings 14:6. Again, it depends on the child’s decision to either live righteously or unrighteously; to either be blessed or cursed by God. The child of a converted parent is “sanctified” or “holy”; that is, he or she CAN have a relationship with God, but the child must respond to God’s sanctification in order to ultimately receive his or her glorification. 

Rightly understood, Proverbs 22:6 does not teach that a child who has been trained by a righteous parent will continue automatically in God’s Way of Life. Proverbs 22:6 reads: “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Some claim, this passage implies that the child might depart for a while from God’s Way of Life, but later return to what he or she has been trained in. Some go a step further and claim that the correct rendering should be, “Train up a child in the way he should go, EVEN when he is old he will not depart from it.” They teach that this passage conveys the thought that the child will never depart from his way, throughout his life, including or even when he or she is old. Most, though, reject this rendering and interpretation for good reasons, as this understanding is clearly not biblical.

The Broadman Bible Commentary points out: “The ‘way he should go’ of v. 6 is not defined specifically, but in the context there can be little doubt that it includes the way reflected in the positive elements of vv. 1, 3, 4, 5, i.e., pious and properly prepared for life. However, this may well include vocational training as well. The training needed for life should be given in the early years, when habits and patterns of behavior and work are set.”

In light of the fact that the Bible emphasizes individual responsibility, it must be concluded that Proverbs 22:6 does not intend to impress the idea that the righteous teaching of parents will automatically lead to the conversion of a child. It is true, of course, that parents are to teach their children about God and His Way of Life (Deuteronomy 11:18-19). But this does not mean that converted parents can bring about the conversion of their children. They have their own responsibility in the matter.

Ultimately, a child who is “brought up” in God’s Church CAN make it into God’s Kingdom. Those who are called today for salvation have been foreknown and predestined by God to be called before they were born. This does not only apply to converted parents, but also to their children (Of course, many times those who were predestined to be called in this day and age were not even children of believing parents, but we are concentrating in this Q&A on those children who were and are being raised by converted parents.)

This means, God is willing to protect them, beginning with conception and birth and continuing throughout their growth until they reach the point where they can become baptized. (Of course, God will continue to protect His converted children.) The influence of their converted parent(s) can be of great help in this regard, but even if both their parents were to leave God’s Church and His Way of Life, this does not mean that the children must follow their bad example. If they have learned that it is God’s Will for them to keep the Sabbath, they can and must decide to continue to do so—even if they are the only ones in their family, in school or on the job. God looks at those who stand up for Him—no matter the costs and circumstances. This requires a strong will and great conviction—but God will give them the strength and the wisdom to continue in His right Way of Life, if they are willing.

It is also true, of course, that those children who are being taught and raised by their converted parents must come to the point where they prove for themselves that what they are being taught is true. They might have developed a “habit,” due to the teaching and practice of their parents, to “keep” the Sabbath by “going to church” that day and sitting quietly in services for two hours, but that alone is never enough. Rather, they must prove for themselves in due time that God demands of them the keeping of the Sabbath and the annual Holy Days; the abstention from unclean meat; and the rejection of observing Sunday, Christmas, Easter or Halloween—again, no matter the costs and circumstances.

The sanctified child, growing up, has a wide-ranging responsibility for making right decisions. Having been taught that it is wrong to smoke or to take drugs or to get tattoos, the child or teen must decide not to smoke or to take drugs or to get tattoos. The sanctified child had been taught that it is wrong to engage in pre-marital or extra-marital sex, and as a teen, he or she has to make the decision not to engage in such practices. The sanctified child had been taught that it is wrong to marry someone who is not converted; and as an adult, he or she has to make the decision not to even consider such a mixed marriage. The sanctified child had been taught that it is wrong to live an alternate lifestyle; as a teen, he or she will have to refuse to become and live as a gay or a lesbian; and he or she will certainly have to refuse to change his or her sex with which he or she was born.

A sanctified child had been taught to stay away from the bad crowd—not to “enter the path of the wicked” (Proverbs 4:14); as a teen or young adult, he or she will need to decide not to follow them or be a part of their company (compare Psalm 1:1). A sanctified child was taught about the Law of God; as a teen or young adult, he or she will have to decide to have “delight… in the law of the LORD” (Psalm 1:2; compare Psalm 119:97). He or she will have to appreciate that the law of God makes him or her wiser than his or her enemies and even his or her teachers (Psalm 119:98-99); and he or she will grow more and more in godly wisdom when doing what God commands (John 7:17; compare John 8:31-32).

As a sanctified child, he or she has been taught that it is wrong to cheat or to lie; as a teen or young adult, he or she will have to decide not to cheat or to lie, having convinced him- or herself that lying is of the devil (John 8:44). As a sanctified child, he or she has been taught that it is wrong to steal or to kill; as a teen or a young adult, he or she will have to decide never to steal or to kill, and his or her conviction will also prevent him or her from joining the army or the police force (compare Matthew 26:52; Revelation 13:10). This is not to say that a young child should ever engage in evil; but in many cases, he or she will behave “correctly”—generally speaking—due to the influence, direction and discipline of his or her parents; but the time will come for the teen or young adult to become thoroughly convicted and, based on this conviction, to decide doing the right thing irrespective of his or her parents.

As we pointed out before, King Josiah was eight years old when he became king. He did what was right, due, no doubt, to his mother’s influence, but when he was sixteen, he himself began to seek the true God, and when he was twenty, he had become convicted and bold enough to carry out what he, as the king in the service of God, was obligated to do (compare again 2 Chronicles 34:3). He started as a young boy and he became a strong man. Others started as young girls and became strong women. They had been sanctified by God, and they fulfilled their destiny (Compare Song of Solomon 8:8-10: When she was young, her older brothers protected her and took care of her, making sure that she lived the right way; when she grew older, she herself decided to live the right way).

It is a priceless privilege to be a “sanctified” child. Only very few children have this privilege today; and those who do should regard it as invaluable. It must never be belittled or neglected or treated in a lackadaisical way. Rather, a sanctified child is holy to God. It must be holy to us as well.

Lead Writer: Norbert Link